Why older women should fuck younger men

I am so fascinated by aging and menopause.

As a teen, I thought my life would be over when I turned 30. I envisioned boredom, being stuck and low in energy.

I was wrong, and I think I realized that by dating older men.

The men I dated who were 10 - 15 years older than me and they were still adventurous, curious and open minded. In addition to that they were much more self confident, experienced and felt more grounded than men my age. I started to look forward to aging, and now I am here.

Pre menopause.

I have never felt as beautiful and fresh as I feel now.

Yes I have cultivated this throughout my life. I have a habit of taking care of my body with exercise, great food and yoga. I have spent my time developing myself, never stuck in one place. Continuously healing my old wounds, breaking ancestral patterns and choosing my thoughts and actions wisely. I am 46 and now I harvest the fruits of my actions.

I feel like I am peaking right now. My energy is high but balanced, my confidence is great and there is no self doubt. I also feel something interesting happening with my sexuality. 

My body changes through pre menopause.

My breasts are more sensitive, and through hormonal changes they sometimes swell up like teen tits. My mucus layers “down there” are more juicy than ever and I feel my libido is strongly increasing. Its like my body is telling me to f**k more.

And yes, having a active s*x life when entering menopause is recommended. The increased activity will improve the blood circulation and the health of the p***y, preventing dryness and imbalances.

I am hornier than ever, but in a new way.

In my past, I felt that sex was something I needed to perform as an act of exchange. I did something sexual in order to get “love” in return. It soothed my insecurity for a while, but it was never enough. I developed some kind of sex addiction.

Now, I learned from experience that no approval or praise from any man could ever make me feel safer than my maturing inner self.

With time and through many lonely heartbreaks, I cultivated my own inner pleasure that is not depending on any partner. Most of the time, I feel pleasure flowing under my skin like a drizzling light.  And sometimes it rolls through my body like roaring waves. To be honest, I don't need a lover, but I am happy to share my orgasmic body with a man. And I have noticed the impact my pleasure has on them. Their confidence and inner glow grows and they feel like great lovers with me.

I have no shame, my body is there to be explored with curiosity and with a beginner's mind. Nothing is too weird or strange, I have heard it all. My sexuality is healing to them, the men.

I heard something interesting the other day.

Someone presented a theory that younger women should date older men and younger men should date older women.

Why?

Because of the matching sexuality.

A young woman needs time, softness and patience to develop her sexuality. She is not supported by the rushing testosterone in a young man, on the contrary - his hurry and insecurity can make her stressed and develop destructive sexual patterns. For a young woman, a man with less testosterone and softer genitals might be a much better match. She may need someone who can stay with her in the waves of her pleasure, and who is confident in the rise and fall of his erection. 

A vaginal orgasm comes in waves that increases from just a small notion, unraveling to bigger and bigger waves. And it's in the pause she can feel it.

A mature man's erection also comes and goes in waves. If he is confident in his body he can dwell in the sensual pauses and allow her to cum, gently. Once the woman has learned what a vaginal orgasm is, there is no need to wait or pause. She knows how to surrender to it.

A younger man has more testosterone and a mature woman has more testosterone in relation to estrogen. Testosterone makes them able to direct the energy, be self confident and indulge in high libido. When a young man is encouraged by a self confident woman to find his purpose and to be in his power he will grow into a strong, powerful man. A mature woman does not accept bullshit and he will learn how to be accountable through her. Together they can have endless sexual pleasure, fueled by their testosterone levels.

I know that this may feel like a utopia for many women in pre-menopause and beyond, and some of you may react strongly to my words, feeling that I am not speaking to you.

But life right now is often the harvest of the seeds you planted earlier, and many of us were never taught how to be soft and gentle with ourselves. We did not learn how to relate to our bodies with safety and curiosity, or how to honor our ever-expanding minds.

When those conditions were missing, it’s understandable that the 40s can arrive with grief rather than celebration, with a sense of having lost youth instead of having ripened into maturity. You may carry stressful sexual patterns leading to reduced libido, less pleasure, or a feeling of disconnection from the sexual body. None of this is a personal failure, it is a reflection of the culture we were shaped in.

And still… menopause is not the end. It is the beginning of something new. Something fabulous. It is the end of people-pleasing and the revival of passion. It is an invitation to start caring for your body in a deeper way — perhaps for the first time — and to begin planting mature seeds to be harvested between the sheets in the future. Maybe with a younger man?

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